Bring Back Nice in 2016

For my Seasonings Givings post, click here.

In May of 2014, I did something slightly great.  I created the Bring Back Nice Facebook Page where I challenged people to do one kind thing a day, everyday.  I posted a couple challenges.  Then someone said they didn't like the challenges so I stopped.  Well, in retrospect, I think I was making the challenges WAY more complicated than they should be.  I accompanied each one with a long-winded blog post explaining everything in detail.  This is not necessary.

This year, I've decided that I'm no longer going to sit by and let the page I created dwindle.  I've gone the easy route, posting pictures or quotes every now and then.  I've been passive and quiet but that's not who I am.  I was recently inspired by The Compassion Collective where 5 amazing authors teamed together to show that when a lot of people each make a small gesture, the total can be something so very big.

I've also recently talked to my friend Taheerah Atchia about greatness and how people need to strive to achieve their greatness.  Well, who am I to tell you go to out and do something great while I sit in my house and watch Netflix?

Bring Back Nice, that's my baby step towards achieving my greatness (whatever that may be).   Each Monday, there will be a challenge on the page.  It will be a simple thing you can do in your everyday life to make the world a better place.  Anyone will be able to do it.  It will not be something you need to be a certain age, live in a certain place, have a certain amount of money, or any other requirement.  The challenges will be about bringing people back to the goodness they have inside of them that anger, resentment, and cynicism have tried to erase.  Please join me on this journey as we take baby steps towards a kinder and better world.

Dancember - Giving Back

Hi friends!  I hope you're having a wonderful day!  We are starting winter break!  Hooray!  I'm excited to have my kids at home and relaxing for a while.  The last few months have been a little rough.

Today, I wanted to share a video that we made as a family for Dancember.  I'm a HUGE fan of ItsJudysLife on YouTube.  This is the third year that I've watched them do Dancember which is when they dance everyday in December in their vlogs to raise awareness for a charity.  Judy and Benji are a wonderful inspiration and they are raising their children to give back to others.  Of course, we love to give back and we LOVE to dance.  I hope you enjoy this video and if you are so moved, please donate HERE.

This year, the Travis family is donating their Dancember proceeds to Rescue Freedom which is an organization that helps survivors of human trafficking.  Human trafficking is a horrendous problem.  There's an estimated 35 million people in slavery TODAY which is more than any other time in history.  Human trafficking is the #2 biggest criminal enterprise in the world.  This happens in the United States too.  You can find these and more stats and information in THIS VIDEO from ItsJudysLife and Rescue Freedom.

We are making a donation and if you'd like to donate go to the Dancember Fundly page.  

Bring Back Nice Challenge #3

Hi friends!  I'm bringing back the Bring Back Nice weekly challenges.  I had a person tell me that they didn't like them and felt that I should remove them from the page so I gave that some thought.  Then I decided that these are OPTIONAL and no one is holding you accountable but yourself.  If you don't like them, don't do them.  I, however, will still be posting them for people who do like them and find them helpful.

Challenge #3: Put Down The Phone!

I know!  I know!  I'm guilty too.  The siren calls of text messages, Candy Crush levels, and fun ideas on Pinterest call to me too.  I love my iPhone.  Passionately.  But you know what?  It's getting in the way of loving and respecting PEOPLE.

Have you ever waited all week to go on a date or to dinner with a person and the whole time you were out, they just stared at their phone?  How did that make you feel?  I'll tell you how it makes me feel.  I feel ignored.  I feel unimportant.  I feel awkward.  I don't appreciate having to repeat myself since people often aren't listening to you when they are on their phones.  I kind of feel like "why did we even bother to go out if I could have just texted you and gotten more attention that way?"  Then I usually end up on my phone because what else am I going to do?  I have no one to talk to.

It's a sad society we live in when a family goes out to dinner and every single person has their face buried in a phone.  What happened to conversation?  What happened to connecting with one another?  One of the major reasons that doctors advocate for eating family dinners is the conversation.  These conversations make your kids more connected to you AND kids who have regular family dinners are less likely to get into fights, be promiscuous, drink alcohol, take drugs, smoke cigarettes, etc... Do you think they are getting that when everyone is just staring at their phone?  My guess is no.

My family and my friends are the most important thing in my world.  The problem is that I'm not acting like they are because I'm busy looking at a screen interacting with people I've never even met or just playing a game.  Kids want to know you're paying attention to them.  They want to SEE your eyeballs.  (Ask me how I know.  ;) )  What is on your phone that is more important than this?

Also, can we talk about the dangers of being glued to your phone instead of paying attention to the other things you're doing?  In my state, it's illegal to drive and use your phone.  It KILLS people.  It's not nice to kill people.  I really don't appreciate people putting my life at risk when I'm in their car so they can check their Facebook and I REALLY don't appreciate when people do that with my kids in the car.  Is it really worth killing yourself or your loved ones to use your phone?  If it's an emergency, pull over.

Over this next week, I challenge you to put down your phone/tablet/laptop and look people in their eyes when you talk to them.  SHOW them that they are important and worth your time.  BE PRESENT.

Come join our Facebook community HERE.

Bring Back Nice: Challenge 2- Social Media Presence

Hi friends!  How are you?  I hope that you are all doing VERY well.  Did you enjoy last week's challenge?  I hope it made you think about how you treat yourself and be more aware of taking care of YOU.

Challenge 2 - Social Media Presence 

This week, we are going to one of the things that got me started on this Bring Back Nice movement.  Social Media.  It is HUGE in today's world!  It seems like everyone is on Facebook, Twitter, blogs, Instagram, YouTube, etc... And with being behind a keyboard comes some keyboard confidence.  I've read a lot of comments on all sorts of platforms that have stopped me in my tracks.  People can be SO mean.

I find it appalling that even people who I consider to be nice people will post things on social media that come across mean.  I guess it's common place in today's world (how sad!)  People will post photos, videos, or statements about other people they've come across in their everyday life for their social media friends to tear apart.  Let's judge a picture of what this person is wearing.  Let's laugh at this person who fell in a puddle.  Let's tear apart this woman's actions in the grocery store.

How many of us stopped to think and feel compassion for these people?  What if the woman/girl/man/boy wearing those too short shorts doesn't have money to buy anything else?  What if that's their only outfit?  What if the person who fell in the puddle WAS YOU?  Would you want your misfortune placed on YouTube?  What if that person who fell got seriously hurt and they ended up dying because of internal injuries?  Would you still laugh then?  What if the woman screaming at the grocery store just found out she has cancer?  Or what if her husband just left her?  Or what if she has been up for 4 days straight with her sick child?  I get it, these are a lot of "what ifs" and they probably don't apply to most situations.  BUT WE DON'T KNOW THAT.  I don't know this person, who am I to judge them?

This week, I want you to go forth and post positive things on your social media platforms.  If posting positive things seems unauthentic to you then I challenge you to bite your tongue and not post snarky things.  If you want to go beyond yourself and expand this challenge, then go spread some love.  Tell a friend how nice they look in a photo they posted.  Leave a comment on your favorite blog or YouTube channel thanking the person for their hard work.  Go encourage someone that is taking on a new venture.  Kindness is free, spread it everywhere!

Also, please join us on our Bring Back Nice Facebook page for more encouragement and to share your experiences with us.

Bring Back Nice: Challenge 1 - Be Nice to Yourself

Over the weekend, I asked if people on the Bring Back Nice Facebook page would be interested in a weekly challenge.  There was a positive response so I decided that I will start posting a challenge with a blog post (for anyone who cares to read my ramblings on it) each Monday.  The challenge is just for fun and for the betterment of ourselves and the world around us.  If you can't or don't want to do it, that is totally fine.  You Bring Back Nice in whatever way you feel is right.  :)

Challenge 1: Be Nice to YOURSELF

I know you're saying "Ashley, I thought the whole point of this movement is to make the world a better place, shouldn't we be doing nice things for other people?"  The answer is yes, do nice things for others but don't forget about yourself.  I find that most people who are busy caring for other people all day often forget about themselves.  And it's really hard to be nice to others when you get to the point where you have neglected yourself for so long that you just feel worn out.

For the challenge, I'd like you to do one nice thing for yourself each day.  Here are some ideas:
~Read a book or magazine for relaxation
~Take a bath
~Get or give yourself a manicure or pedicure
~Watch a movie
~Get a massage
~Treat yourself to a coffee or smoothie (or whatever you like)
~Do some crafting
~Listen to your favorite music and just sit
~Call your best friend or mom or other favorite relative just to chat
~Meditate
~Do that spa/craft/cooking kit thing that you bought for yourself and never got around to doing
~Do a face or hair mask
~Go to a bookstore and just hang out
~Do your favorite hobby or whatever makes you HAPPY

But beyond these little things that you can do FOR yourself, I want you to be nice TO yourself.  Bringing Back Nice is a mindset.  It's a movement to bring back kindness into every day life.  And you can't be nonjudgmental, compassionate, and kind to other people if you are constantly beating yourself up.  You do not need to put yourself down to bring someone else up!  Be kind to yourself not just in the actions you do that other people can see like treating yourself to a nice hair cut but in the way you talk to yourself and the way you treat yourself.  Give yourself some grace.  I read a quote once that to paraphrase said "If we treated our friends like we treated ourselves, we wouldn't have any friends left."  And that's just sad.

If you'd like to join along in the challenge, you can go to the Bring Back Nice Facebook Page and check in with us or you can leave a comment right here telling me how you were nice to YOURSELF this week.  Or you can leave a comment everyday when you do a nice thing for yourself.  Or you can just do it and not leave comments.  Whatever you like.  :)  I just hope this encourages you to Bring Back Nice.  Remember, love starts at home.  ;)  

Bring Back Nice: Kid's Challenge

Hi friends!  I hope you're having a wonderful day!  We are doing pretty good around here.

Today, I'm writing the second post of my Bring Back Nice movement.  You can find the first post HERE.  It's reached a lot of people so far and I'm really excited!  I would love to hear what you all are doing to Bring Back Nice!

One of the main reasons I wanted to start this movement was for my children.  As with all parents, I want my kids to grow up in a better world.  I also want to teach them that it starts with each individual person.  I issued them the same Bring Back Nice challenge that I issued to everyone else.  Do one nice thing a day, everyday.  Then we reflect upon what they did, talk about how it made them feel, and how they think the other person felt when receiving their kindness.

Here are some ideas of what kids can do to Bring Back Nice:
~Give someone a hug
~Pay someone a nice compliment
~Smile at people
~Include classmates in games especially if they are alone
~Open doors for people
~Pick up litter at the park
~Pick flowers from the garden and give them to someone
~Bring an apple to their teacher
~Pick out clothes or toys they've grown out of and donate them
~Share their favorite toy with a sibling
~Draw someone a picture and mail it to them
~Leave a nice note for someone
~Call a relative to say hello

What are some things you think kids can do to Bring Back Nice?  Will you be challenging your children?

Also, please keep in touch with the Bring Back Nice community using the Bring Back Nice Facebook Page.

Bring Back Nice - A Movement

Today, while I was scrolling through Facebook I noticed how much unpleasantness is out there.  Unpleasantness from my own friends, people who I have deemed to be nice and wanted in my life.  I'm guilty of it myself.  We post status updates complaining about a stranger that cut us off or ignored our no soliciting sign and woke the baby.  We post pictures of fashion faux pas for people to tear apart online.  We spread hate about people who do things differently from us.  How dare that mom come to preschool drop off in full makeup, doesn't she have a life?  How dare someone parent differently, vote differently, eat differently, drive differently, etc?

If this is the norm and all my friends are "nice people" then I truly don't want to know what the mean people are posting. When did it because so normal to be snarky and mean-spirited?  When did it become common practice to make fun of everything and everyone?  People made fun of Gabby Douglas's hair when she was in the Olympics, she was only 16 at that point.  Who makes fun of a KID?  I've seen people on YouTube make fun of BABIES.  What is wrong with this world?  What happened to MANNERS?

I remember breaking down in a friend's car in high school several times.  At that point, people pulled over to help us.  One person went to the gas station and bought us sealed waters so we knew they were safe to drink.  Last summer, my van broke down on a very busy street.  I had all three of my kids in the car.  ONE person rolled down their window to ask if we were ok.  Other people honked, flipped us off, and yelled.  What has happened to the world?  Remember once upon a time when someone fell, you helped them up?  These days people film it and put it on YouTube so other people can have a good laugh at you.  And that is sad.

I don't want my kids growing up in this kind of world.  We need to make a change and it really all starts with one person, right?  I want to start a movement.  I want to BRING BACK NICE.  I want those days of being kind and neighborly to come back.  I want people to extend grace to one another. I want people's faith in the human spirit to be restored.  And it all starts with you!  You, wherever you are, whoever you are.

I'm challenging EVERYONE to do ONE nice thing a day.  Let's BRING BACK NICE!  Let's make nice common practice.  Let's teach our children to be nice to each other and that there are nice people out there.  Let's set an example.

Here are a few ideas of what you can do (but do whatever your heart desires):
Pick up trash
Bring a sick person dinner
Donate unused items to charity
Smile at everyone you see
Donate blood
Take a friend out for coffee
Bake a treat and bring it into work for your coworkers
Gift someone a bouquet of flowers from your garden
Leave a coupon on a product at a store
Pay someone a nice compliment
Send a card to let someone know you're thinking about them
Hold the door for the person behind you

No matter how big or how small, check go out and do it.  Also, come share with me on the Bring Back Nice Facebook Page.  I will be posting reminders so everyone can post what they did each day.  I hope that these posts from others will inspire people.  Will you please help me Bring Back Nice?

***HUGE thank you to my friend Tifany for the awesome logo she designed!***